To Thy Own Self, Be Forgiving
"If there's no enemy within, the enemy outside can do us no harm."
- Old African Proverb
For most people the worst critic of their mistakes is found within. For most of us no one is harder on us than us. Everyone in the world can overlook & forgive our mistakes but us. We toss & turn at night, stay preoccupied all day, & are constantly distracted by thoughts of second guessing, regret, & frustration. We offer & freely give forgiveness to everyone but ourselves.
I know this road because I've been there. You can drive yourself to the brink of insanity & anxiety by not processing & moving beyond your mistakes. You can't sweep it under the rug, ignore it, or pretend it didn't happen. You have to face it. But when you face it then you can begin the process of forgiveness. If you don't, the guilt, anxiety, & sleepless nights will drive you to some dark places. You have to forgive yourself.
How to forgive yourself
1. Own it.
Acknowledge you've made a mistake & take ownership.
2. Do what you can to fix.
Whatever you can do to make amends & fix it, do it. Sometimes all that is available to you is to ask for forgiveness. Ask. Ask God & whoever is affected.
3. Forgive yourself.
Don't let the mistake become amplified by anxiety. After you've owned it, done what's possible to repair it, taken a moment to breath, then walk away from it with peace. Learn from it, grow stronger, become a better person but don't revisit it.
No amount of guilt can undue the past and no amount of anxiety will change the future. You can't start every day covered in the broken pieces of yesterday. Forgive yourself & start each day anew. Stop stumbling on hurdles behind you. Ultimately if God forgives you (which He does) then you can't hold it against yourself either. The moment you asked He forgave you. Now do your part & do the same. Even if others don't, you have to follow God’s lead & forgive yourself.
Everyone makes mistakes. That's doesn't mean you're a bad person or that you should suffer for the rest of your life for it. Your mistakes are meant to guide you not define you. Good people make bad choices. It doesn't mean you're bad.....
It means your human.
Welcome to the club.
There's like 7 billion of us.